It was dark outside,
She was working alone,
Helping others live.
Little did she know,
that the pain won’t lessen- not even a little bit,
It’ll just keep deepening, like a bottomless pit.
Only 25, straight out of college,
She was young and free
Wondering that, “If anything happened, would they even believe me?”
It was the 6th of June,
Her life was shaken up like a typhoon.
The day went by normally
Doing her job, eating and sleeping
All before he came in creeping.
Where there was once love, now there is only pain
She would never have innocence, ever again.
He took it away from her, her childhood,
He took away all that was good.
These mornings, she still wakes up and cries
Others she curls up and hopes to die.
“Are you sure something happened?” “Are you sure you want to tell someone?” they all crowd up and ask
She lays there and screams but the pain doesn’t pass.
The moment it happened, she broke inside,
Every breath she took after, nothing felt worthwhile.
She spends her mornings trying to fight for herself
And nights trying to avoid the nightmares.
All of the suffering just for a husk of a boy,
She was nothing, no life- just his toy.
So she continues to lie, hide the pain inside
Wondering why, she shouldn’t have died
Maybe one day it would makes sense more and more
Why does everything feel so numb and sore?
He ran away, he left. He does what he wants.
He roams around free while she has to hide “what happened to me”.
He laughs, he’s happy, he lives.
He celebrates his victory. He does what he wants.
He leaves again, opening the door,
Says to be ready when he wants more.
They say, the men in uniforms, “You can tell us anything. What happened?”
She wants to scream, she wants to shout-
“My mind maddened”
“My heart darkened”
“My life blackened”
She closes her eyes, unaware of the puddle of her own tears she’s drowning in.
She’s suddenly back there again.
The cold touch of his rough hands dangling on her foot
Her muted screams, oppressed by the cloth on her mouth.
“Look at the length of her skirt” “Look at her top” “She was clearly asking for it”,
The words of the society echo through her body.
They send chills up her spine. Will this feeling ever be fine?
She tells them the truth, “what happened to me”.
They said they’re sorry now that they see.
But she’s still broken for she still sees him,
Still she is in pain, for she’s still a victim.
One of these days she hopes to heal,
One of these days, they’ll get him for real.
Now that you know, the whole truth,
Finally we can drop the pretense of youth.
She’ll never get past it- the night she was raped,
It’s part of it now, how she was shaped.
She can’t get justice now, it’s been too long.
But it is not her fault, he was wrong.